k-pop

oh no

thats me in the middle with my friends K-pop

NEW YEARS

2009...wasn't too good to me BBBBBUT it was a good year 'cause i learned alot. I for sure became more independent. Resolutions?
1.Became a man of God
2.Become better son,brother,friend
3.CONTINUE MMA
4.A's
5.MOVE ON!
6.become a master of unexpected drop kicks

<3 thanks 2009 you weren't too kind to me but i know your friend 2010 is going to be real nice;}

First single

Lil Boner(left) Young Jizzy (right)

Premiere of the new single by the dynamic duo Lil Boner and Young Jizzy
http://www.zshare.net/audio/6982843704ed7739/
(Warning Explicit lyrics)

end

man what an eyeopener...i should've handled that situation differently but it showed how immature we both are. we're both pretty shady, too shady to be involved in any kind of relationship with anyone.its for the best to not even acknowledge...for sure for the best. what a way to boost the process of getting over huh? anyways bout time i started getting over and moving on with errthang. for sure in the future...make sure no one ever goes through what she went through. maan what happened? jeesh so stressful to see how much has changed but its the past COME ON FUtURE HURRY THE EFF UP

problem

man...the past catches up quick sometimes
hope i never do anything like i did to her to anyone else...ever.

clarity

hate it when people are vague...its stupid. please be honest...if something bothers you or if you want something by pete's sake SAY IT

learning loving living

I've been learning alot lately. How to control my anger, my tongue, and how to act. I've especially seen the tongue part because in some instances where i could totally destroy someone or make someone feel like crap i don't. :D im glad that i can do that now or know when or when not to talk. I really hope I can become the mature christian i want to be. But being christian is so hard!(its worth it thought) I started doing p90x and MAN! am i dying!!! i really hope i can drop 15 lbs by january or feburary or by summer at least. i guess im doing this for myself and at the same time ;] the ladies. 3/4 of the way to moving on! i gots to let go of them memories 'cause by the way we talk she has already moved on...i realized that she isnt coming back ever but why can't i let go of them memories? i wonder if my mental image of her matches with who she really is. HMM oh wellz! man but right now i like how my lifes been going. good friends good times and good vibes all around...i really like the group of firends i've been kicking it with. its awesome

hm

sometimes it never ceases to amaze me how shady some peoeple are...no matter how much their shadiness kicks their butt they never change. it makes me curious. do they not see how shady they are?idk whatevz still thankful for homies though!

slkj

step 1/4 complete! i wish i was more creative so i can come up with creative namez! i realized i like being at home...moving out is overrated seriously.this past weekend i realized that without a car im helpless and not that many of my friends drive either...lamez dude.loving this weather for sure! bustin' out all my sweaters and stuffz tight dooode

strange

hmmm very strange. lately i've been slightly socially awkward...sometimes i'll meet someone new or even my friends but i'll have nothing to say and i'll just sit there feeling super awkward. its been happening alot especially around girls. very very weird...i don't know whats wrong with me. i like to think of myself as a pretty social guy but seriously lately i've been feeling very awkward around people. maybe i'm going crazy IDKz!

changes

theres alot of stuff that i should take into consideration. like following through with stuff...i realized that when it comes to friends i always stuff but most of times i dont follow through. i'm glad i got some good homies who point out that kind of stuff to me...sure i hate to hear it but i know i gots to. maybe thats why i lost her...not following through. i got alot of stuff to change about myself and i know that i've been given this life to be constantly growing and changing. i hope that some of the things i've done doesn't push my friends away. 'cause i really like the friends i have right now...i need this group of friends to be consistent, i'm tired of constantly changing friend groups. i'm determined to keep these friends life long...so i guess since i love em imma change for em. dang...my bad guys
for everyone who i've annoyed or hurt by some of the schtuff i do...my bad.
thats all i can say...i've gotta work in following through. dammit.

dangit

wish i knew how to play guitar and sing like john mayer

dangit

dangit dude...tom's are so dope!

memory

cant help but keep thinking about_________. its hard not to...dammit dude my minds preoccupied by one person.

running dry

...i realized i really dislike it when people get in my face. i'm so glad i'm not the old me, but still i don't know how long i can take it.
God give me strength. i need to be a man of prayer and i need to control my mouth...lesson well learned.

wishful thinking

sometimes i wish things would never go wrong. i believe the saying is true "good things never last". i really wished they would...dang it.



i feel like im in that car...everything going sosososo fast. can't believe its been almost 3 years its crazy.

ANYWAYS chillin' with the homies lately and its been SUPA fun. so sad alot of them be going back to berkley :[ can't wait to move in to my APARTMENT BABY! and i've also started my apps for cornell and UOR. hope i get in...dang dude i'm a 2nd year already.
that picture is super relative right now

eyes

i gotta open my eyes...sometimes the best way is a slap in the face.
right now i feel like a drunk person being slapped in the face, i feel nothing.
i want to say it isnt so, SO badly...but truth hurts i guess. i want to defend the both of them, but it is what it is. I really wish that it is a big misunderstanding but i KNOW it isn't and i really wish he was my homie. sometimes the best way is a slap in the face. you can truly tell who cares about you 'cause they're the ones who tell you straight out. truth hurts but i mean that's why the people who speak the truth are the loneliest.

naivity

man...i'm not letting go
ever. it'll be worth it hopefuly if not, i can say i tried my best

hardest part

hardest part is letting go...but the most rewarding at the end

back home

man...what a blessed short term missions it was.
this year went by so fast and i think its ;cause of my attitude...WAY different from last year...just really sad it had to end.
i've been doing alot of thinking and sometimes i wonder why i do things i do...why i say the things i say. alot of times i do it and regret it later idk why...maybe its human nature.
i should be mad about what happened...but i dont think that person knows that no matter what i can never be mad at that person.
this trip was such a growing opportunity and im sure i grew immensly from it i know i did...it was a big eye opener too.
hopefully i will not think that missions is over. i really hope and pray i will seriously have that mission mindset and heart.
just im curious to what i'll do in my free time...





























i've decided next 3-4 years imma grow spiritually and mature and i'll fulfill what i promised to you...

feels good to be home